You guys, I fell asleep while The German and I were having sex last night. It was in the middle of round 2. We were doing it in spooning position laying down, and I just dozed off while he was in me! Lol… but in my defense, I was under the influence of .5mg of xanax (that’s the most I can handle…even though my prescription says 1mg twice a day 0_0,) some wine, and a few hits of the blunt he rolled.
It was my first time seeing him again after Spain, and I had in mind to make up for the fact that I was knocked out for the majority of that trip due to jetlag. (Even though when it came time to have sex, I (and the fellow escort) rocked his world.)
He didn’t care that I passed out last night though, and I’m doing another overnight with him later on. I think another cup of coffee is definitely in order.
That making money has healing powers? I was feeling like butt today (random muscle aches, overall tired feeling…think it was due to a high-anxiety week last week) but during the hour that my client was here, I felt just fine and dandy.
what the heck, body…
Guys, if you meet a girl off of a regular dating site and she keeps accidentally referring to her profile as her website, she is probably a pro.
did i really just forget to shave one whole leg?
omg i fucking hate anxiety
it was a simple phone call. with my best friend. i shouldn’t feel this way.
and now it’s just a simple text convo. with my fb. fuck this
just had to get this off my chest
guess i’ll stop being lazy and take this appointment…and verify these new clients
so many requests for today
also going over my fb’s place later tonight…just wish i hadn’t masturbated a million times last night…hope I’m just as horny later
Soon, I will be halfway in the real world (getting hired part time as an LMT at a spa…because this is necessary for various reasons) so I decided it was time to lightly blur my face in my ads and on my website. But I just couldn’t let go of my Selfies! page…so I made it password protected.
That’s right, I’m exclusive.
As I’ve gotten older, my fuck buddies’ dicks have gotten smaller. Not a bad thing, because big dicks were always uncomfortable and sometimes painful for me. Just…strange… And if this continues, judging by the size of my current fb’s, I might need to keep him around for a long while. #butthenwhat? #gobacktoanoldone? #ormarryhim? #teamaverage
As my plane departed from Barcelona, I started to cry silently. Maybe it was because I had been up all night, maybe it was because everything I had been feeling suddenly came together all at once…right there in my seat by the window.
As the plane took off, I pictured the last night with TheGerman. I remembered how secure I felt as we walked down the Spanish avenue to go to dinner. He loved the red dress I wore, and he always mentions how other people look at me as we walk together. I know that they’re really looking at us, but I don’t say that. I held on to that image in my head…the freedom that I felt, that I always feel when escorting. Because that is what I love.
Despite my recent experience with being more than ready to give up my job for the love of a person, despite that love causing me to think about the wives of my lying clients, despite my want to feel that love again and all the passion, desire, and beautiful ups and downs that it comes with… I’m not ready to give this up.
Being in love needs to be its own chapter…and from what I’ve read, that part of my life needs a lot of work.
I made a breakthrough last night while talking to my friend. I told him that I’m used to feelings being expressed through anger and hurt… I don’t feel a thing when things are calm. I always knew that, but it’s different when you actually speak the words.
Can you even fix something like that? I guess time will tell. But again, that’s another chapter…
Randomly woke up at 4am and listened to music. Still can’t sleep so I’m in the hotel lobby eating ChipsAhoy!. Think I’m still a little drunk…and TheGerman is upstairs snoring. I did have a nice time with him and the fellow escort. Will write about it later…when I know what my mind is doing
Good morning from Spain!
I arrived yesterday morning after meeting up with TheGerman in Amsterdam (we had the same connecting flight.) We walked around Plaça de Catalunya while waiting for our rooms to become available…he got me my own room for the first night because he knew I’d need some rest after my long day :). He’s so sweet!
We had breakfast this morning before he had to go to a meeting. I’m now chilling in the hotel, charging my phone and backup battery. About to go roam around for a bit towards El Raval.
Later, TheGerman and I are meeting for dinner with his other escort friend…and coming back to the hotel for his “experiment” as he likes to call it lol.
This espresso I’m sipping, combined with the coffee from breakfast, is starting to kick in, so once my battery is full, I’m off to explore!